[Gil pulls in a choppy, stammered breath, not daring or wanting to let Oz go, flush to his ears and stunned and smitten. For the moment, his fears and complications decimated, all he's got when he looks at Oz is awe and love.]
[He just wanted to see what his expression was so he could tease him, but then Oz saw Gil's face and he couldn't help but feel a little embarrassed himself]
. . . I must have really given you a hard time, didn't I?
I'm hard to deal with, but I know you're used to that so I'm not worried about that. I'm worried about everything else. The past, who I am, everything that's happened so far...
I know you're ready to give up everything for me because I'm your master so I definitely trust that you'll follow me no matter what. But I want Gil to be able to choose what HE wants for his own reasons. I shouldn't take that away from you.
[he bites his lip, flushing-- he can hardly believe this is happening, every bit of him is still reeling.]
Now more than I ever have, I love you and belong to you. Not because you're my master. Because of everything you showed me and proved to me and gave me, everything we've lived together. You've saved me over and over. Every choice I make I make it as I belong to you, whether you claim me or not. I know how you are, and you deserve...
If you asked me to leave everyone behind but you, I wouldn't even believe it was you asking me. You've never been like that.
You're perfect, Oz. It's more-- do you really want me, with my past, who I am, and everything I've done-- everything I want to keep doing?
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That. Idiot.
Y-- you didn't say anything--!
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Though there's one thing I'm certain that you don't know.
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W--what could be left.
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Elliot--!
I...
I'm sorry... I've always been stupid...
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[reaching to grab for your face, laughing]
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I know you know--! I'm sorry! I'm sorry. Oz.
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[tugging at his face, pulling it doooown]
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[if this is a dream i hope i just die right now that would be okay]
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[eventually oz pulls away from the kiss long enough to stare at gil's face for a moment. of course, he's still clinging to him either way]
[jiiiii]
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I KNOW I REPLIED TO THIS SOB I AM SORRY
. . . I must have really given you a hard time, didn't I?
IT'S OKAY I DIDN'T WANT TO FUSS I LOVE YOU!!1
H-hard... always! But being in love with you is the only thing that's easy!
YOU'RE ALLOWED TO FUSS AT ME ALWAYS!!!!!!!
Easy? But I've ended up putting you through a lot . . .
;o;
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[With-- you giving me a hard time? ???]
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I know you're ready to give up everything for me because I'm your master so I definitely trust that you'll follow me no matter what. But I want Gil to be able to choose what HE wants for his own reasons. I shouldn't take that away from you.
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[he bites his lip, flushing-- he can hardly believe this is happening, every bit of him is still reeling.]
Now more than I ever have, I love you and belong to you. Not because you're my master. Because of everything you showed me and proved to me and gave me, everything we've lived together. You've saved me over and over. Every choice I make I make it as I belong to you, whether you claim me or not. I know how you are, and you deserve...
If you asked me to leave everyone behind but you, I wouldn't even believe it was you asking me. You've never been like that.
You're perfect, Oz. It's more-- do you really want me, with my past, who I am, and everything I've done-- everything I want to keep doing?
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